Monday, January 07, 2008

That's life

After spending the whole day reading blogs, BBs, updating my blogg roll AND stitching I only feel a tad guilty. I do feel like I'm getting a bit of my life back and I hope it's going to help me in the long run to achieve other goals. But surely, I do need to limit those activities, LOL.

Anyway, I have a first, still fairly small, but a very real BLOB on my Dimensions Winter's Lace. I decided to indulge in a new start for the GFJ (Guilty Free January) to celebrate my coming back to stitching. I've chosen this design, because DBF loves wolves and I wanted to stitch something for him iat last. I am going to OOAT on it at the moment, util I'm bored and then move to one of my older WIPs that got so mercilessly neglected last year. But at the moment I'm enjoying my wolvies :)

DBF is sitting and finishing his paper for school. It's going to be ready this night, and we're going to celebrate it tomorrow by spending the day together and having fun. Well, I don't have anything to celebrate actually, but I hope a worry-free day is going to give me a kick in my own work. Also tomorrow we're going to be at the same place with DBF - master thesis + three exams left to finish. Actually my exams have nothing to do with school, but three exams are three exams. My deadline for master thesis is mid-Feb though, so I need to be working faster. I want to win the race anyway ;P

Which brings me to the topic of my in-laws-to-be. I do not have much experience with in-laws in general, especially not such ones... I do not get them at all, they always say how much they care for us and how important we are, but they act just the opposite. On Christmas, for example, they stopped talking to DBF, because he hadn't finished his paper for school. Now, surely he should have, etc. but first we pay for our living ourselves and second they didn't even ask for reasons. And third if they're not talking to DBF why they also refused to wish a Merry Christmas to me and DD?? I don't get it at all, in the end they just said DBF should send them a letter when he has finished that stupid paper, so that they can get on speaking terms with us again.

Of course, there is a lot of story behind that, DBF has been struggling to finish school for years, much too long. Everyone knows that. Last year he finally went to counselling, which revealed learning disabilities, etc. and things started to get better. I also try to help as much as I can, re-read his papers (which is not easy, German is not my mother tongue), support him, etc. And I can see progress. But expecting him to be finished with a month or two is simply not realistic. It's not that he's not smart, he's been working for years in the industry, even though he's not an engineer yet, has some patents and has been supporting his family. But writing, especially those ultra-long scientific papers is another story.

I am also guilty of slacking off for much too long and losing some very good career chances. In fact I still struggle to get back on the right path. But we both have shattered families behind us and some life experience that I do not wish to anyone. I was very very ill last year, up to the point that my Mom had to take my DD with her for several weeks, because I was not able to care for her. DBF lost his kids.

But then, we both survived whatever happened, we are back on track, more or less, we are building a new family, with much success. DD's speach therapist commented short before Christmas, that she rarely sees such happy, open and balanced children. She should have seen her several months ago and she had been shocked. It has been a very hard work to get to this point and the credit goes to all three of us.

I hope the learning & career front is going to get sorted out exactly the same way, stpe by step, getting back on the right track, reaching milestone after milestone and finally getting at the place where we are both comfortable. But what we need at the moment is some support,or at least leaving us in peace, not calling names and accusing us of everything bad that happened on this planet.

All in all, in a way, I am happy that the in-laws are not speaking with us. At least I'm not fearing the telephone ringing any more and I'm not dreading having to visit them in January. To every cloud, there's a silver lining...

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Blogger anneke said...

Hi Gosia,
there have much been going on in your life! I'm happy to read you're back on track now.

10:18 AM  
Blogger Deborah/LavenderRose said...

Gosia, Thank you for stopping by my blog! Your life sounds full and filled also with stresses. I have been there in my younger days. Just take it one single day at a time..focus on yourself and your DD, and things will be fine. If you take in the BIG picture all the time, it will sink you, dear Gosia. Thinking of you... Hugs, Deb

12:48 AM  

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